disconnect

I remember my teacher in school used to say (not to me) sometimes that you are physically present here but your mind is not in the class. I couldn't used to understand that time what she means. I always thought that our mind is here only it is just that we are not able to understand sometimes.

Now, i can perfectly understand the meaning of those words cause no matter what i am doing and how hard i try, i just can't keep my mind wherever i am. Its not that i am always thinking about something or someone(most of times) but i am always thinking of something not connected with my present surroundings.

This is good or bad. I think it is bad cause i am not able to concentrate on my work. I want to read but i just can't concentrate and most of reading is kind of passive reading. I doubt if whatever i read really goes in my mind and even a fleck of it remains there.

Though some people say this is your creativity, your power to dream.

I don't know its good or bad, the fact is that this is happening. Sometimes when i know what distant thoughts i am having will or can become reality i enjoy them. Sometimes when i know that it may not get full fill it hurts me. I don't want to keep on living like this, i don't know the medicine also.

Only time, which certainly bring change with it, is my only hope.